Month: September 2022

Terror and excitement are not so far apart

Nervous system hybrid states and how they show up in dreams 

Not all dreams are pure fight/flight, but much like our complex nervous systems they can express hybrid states. We are all familiar with the nightmares of being chased (flight response) or weighed down with helpless immobility (dorsal vagal response). These are fear-based dreams, but they take on a very different tone when imbued with a sense of safety.

At its most basic level safety allows for social engagement, a sense of being at home in the company of those we love and trust. There are also hybrid states, where how safe we feel can mediate how our nervous system responds. When we are immobilized with safety, this allows for stillness, intimacy and bonding. When we are activated with safety, this allows for excitement, sport and play.

The genius of the polyvagal theory developed by Dr. Stephen Porges is that it takes us beyond the simple categorization everyone rattles off without much thought – the well-known fight/flight/freeze paradigm. When naming and understanding our autonomic state, Porges puts safety first.

A neuroception of safety is automatic, not intellectual

What does Porges mean by safety? His polyvagal theory is referring not to literal safety, but rather, bodily-sensed safety. Many who experience activated nervous systems, fear responses and nightmares are not in any real, physical danger, but there is no way to convince them of this, at least not by simply saying so.  Porges’ model stresses the neuroception of safety, that full-body sense which happens automatically, beyond conscious control, that allows our system to relax and repair.

When we are not experiencing rejuvenating embodied safety (a ventral vagal state), our dreams come as nightmares, as being chased or in aggressive encounters (fight/flight) or as helplessness immobility (often called freeze, those this word is not quite accurate). When our bodies feel safe, we dream of social encounters, of intimacy, adventures and play. Our dreams depict how safe or endangered we feel. As such, they can be a doorway to shifting these states at a deep level.

Autonomic state shifts are common — our nervous systems are always working to balance the need for safety and self-protection with those of social engagement, healing, digestion and the achievement of homeostatic balance. When our system perceives threat, things like digesting food or making love are luxuries our bodies senses we can’t afford… whether or not this is actually true.

Our sense of safety or danger is not always accurate

How do our bodies get this wrong? Much of the mismatch comes from early programming, from chronic exposure to neglect or trauma that creates nervous system responses that are either too sharp, too dull or a mixture of both. Those with complex trauma histories, for example, can perceive danger where none exists, or be blithely unaware of actual threatening situations and walk into danger without knowing it. Our dreams can provide both clues and solutions as they reflect our unconscious ANS responses.

During typical sleep, we shift states many times, alternating periods of deep restorative sleep with progressively longer period of dream-rich rapid-eye movement (REM) sleep. In these state shifts, we are most likely to become aware of our dreams and to be awakened by those that are particularly intense. Nightmares can disrupt sleep and affect mood, but they can also open the door to autonomic state shifts that can be lasting.

If we approach our dreams with curiosity, and begin to cultivate mastery and degrees of lucidity, we may be able to shift our dreamscape from a pervasive sense of threat to one of safety, changing our whole experience of the dreaming. This is easier to do that one might think. One chronic nightmare sufferer I worked with was able to turn a face her pursuers and discovered they were far less threatening than expected, and this changed the nature of her dreams. The chase dreams still visit at times, but now they have taken on more of an adventurous feel, one of excitement rather than terror – a similar activated state, but with more of a sense of safety.

Hybrid states show us that the programming our nervous systems received early in life may be tenacious, but it is also malleable. Change is possible, and dreams are one pathway to understanding and altering our habitual responses.

For more on this topic, join Dr. Leslie Ellis for a workshop on Nightmares and The Nervous System October 13, from 9:30-noon (Pacific)

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Slippery Fish: How to remember your dreams

When I tell people I work with and write about dreams, often the first thing they say is, “I don’t dream.” Or sometimes, more accurately, “I don’t remember my dreams.”

We all dream what is in essence a feature film worth of dreams every night, but the vast majority of these nocturnal movies are not merely forgotten, but not laid down in accessible memory in the first place. Dreams are like slippery fish: at night they rise from the depths of implicit memory and most of them slip back into this subconscious realm before we have a chance to catch them. But there are some reliable ways to improve your dream recall.

Have you ever noticed that the vast majority of your dreams are not finished? They tend to end right in the middle of something that is striking or scary enough to wake you up. I think this is why dreams tend generally to have such a flamboyant way of expressing themselves – it often takes something quite dramatic for a dream to break through to consciousness. Some dreams are so vivid and engaging, we wake up with their images still resonating in our minds and bodies.

Still, it takes a deliberate effort to recall even some of the most fascinating dreams. Many dreamers have the experience of a stunning dream that wakes them up. They think, “Wow, this is something I will not forget,” only to find that by morning all they remember was the experience of having a big dream but not the dream itself.

Our most vivid, emotionally-toned and complex dreams happen later in the sleep cycle, toward morning. I find that if you are able to wake up naturally and have some time to linger in the dream world before you leap out of bed and start your day, you have a better chance of catching hold of your dream before it slips away. If you lie very still when you first wake up, the dream is more likely to stay with you. And if you rehearse it in your mind a few times and then write it down before you get on with the business of your day, you will find that you have not only captured this dream, but others will come.

The more we pay attention to our dreams, the more they are likely to respond back to us. I have worked with psychotherapy clients’ dreams for about 20 years and found that even those who profess not to dream were able to recall dreams once I started asking about them and talking in depth about the dreams they did bring. At first people who don’t profess to dream much might capture only a snippet or two and not think much of it. But even little scraps of image can reveal themselves to be significant if they are inquired into with deep curiosity and respect.

To sum up, to remember your dreams, begin by taking an interest in them and going to bed with the intention of recalling them. Keep a dream journal by your bedside. When you first wake up, don’t move, but linger in the space in between waking and dreaming and see if you can recall anything at all from the night, even images or fragments that seem tiny. Rehearse what you can recall in your mind a few times – dreams are like slippery fish wanting to escape back into the deep waters of our unconscious. Once you have the dream clear in your mind, write it down, ideally before you do anything else.

If you tell your dreams to someone else, work with them in a group, draw the images they bring you, reflect on them and enjoy them, more will come. You will start to see patterns and appreciate their startling creativity and complexity. They are like an honest friend who is not afraid to tell you the truth, even if it’s painful. They can become your great ally.

Nightmares and the nervous system: How the content of your nightmares can guide recovery from disturbed dreaming

The content of our dreams offers clues about the state of our nervous system. As we know from current research on recurrent dreams, these often depict being chased, feeling helpless or, if positive, represent ways of being socially engaged. Anyone familiar with the polyvagal theory will recognize these states as the some of the main expressions of different states of autonomic nervous system (ANS): being chased is fight/flight, helplessness is immobility and social engagement corresponds with the ventral vagal state the body enters when feeling safe.

A new wave of somatically-oriented trauma therapies has swept through the field of trauma treatment as a result of what we now know about the nervous system. I love that these new approaches view ANS responses as adaptive rather than pathological. I am also impressed at how neatly such constructs map onto dream content. Clinicians can use this information from dreams to inform diagnosis and treatment, and to map clinical progress. For example, when recurrent dreams change, this is can indicate clinical progress as it coincides with increased well-being.

My upcoming journal article, Solving the Nightmare Mystery: How Polyvagal Theory Updates Our Understanding of the Aetiology and Treatment of Nightmares, takes Porges’ polyvagal theory and the nervous system into account when considering the causes and treatment of nightmares; it is in the final stages of production for APA journal Dreaming. The article articulates both a theory and treatment approach that I will cover in more detail in my upcoming workshop on October 13 (participants will receive an advance copy). One of the practical take-aways is the matching of dream content with autonomic states. Here is an excerpt from my article:

“It is possible to map the hierarchy of threat responses onto the content of nightmares. Virtually all fear-based nightmares contain material that represents either an activated fight/flight response or a helpless immobilized response in the face of threat. A recent study to determine the main themes in nightmare content (n = 1216) points to a strong, though not perfect, correlation between most common nightmare themes and the polyvagal response hierarchy. In order, the most frequent nightmare themes identified by Schredl and Goritz (2018) were failure or helplessness (immobility), physical aggression (fight), accidents, being chased (flight), illness or death (immobility), and interpersonal conflict (fight).”

In my doctoral research, I conducted a related qualitative study (Ellis, 2016), looking at changes in recurrent nightmare content after treatment using a protocol that is a precursor to the Nightmare Relief protocol I now use and teach.  The recurrent nightmares of study participants changed after treatment toward more empowered responses, moving up the polyvagal hierarchy of threat responses — from immobility to flight to fight. Also, the dreams that came after treatment began to weave in current settings and characters from the dreamer’s life shifting away from a focus in past trauma. The progression of dream content from replicative and recurrent toward dreams with strange twists and temporal anomalies (ie more normal dreaming) often coincides with trauma recovery.

Relevant to polyvagal theory, I also noticed that the dreams post-treatment tended to move toward greater social engagement: “When dreamers were asked to rescript their dream endings, they almost invariably imagined ‘home.’ The quality of home is similar to Porges’ ventral vagal state: not necessarily a literal place (especially for those whose actual homes were unsafe), but rather a sense of safety in the company of trusted others.” This is a clue about how to help with nightmares – assisting dreamers to reimagine their dreams in ways that feel safer can shift them, and reduce the aversion nightmare sufferers tend to have toward sleep and dreams.

In my upcoming seminar, I will present the most salient aspects of this material and focus mainly on introducing the Nightmare Relief protocol. I will be able to offer more detail, clinical examples, demos and experiential practices than are covered in the academic paper. I would like those who take this workshop to be able to put these ideas into practice right away with clients who suffer from nightmares and disturbing dreams.

To sum up, I have arrived at the idea that the nervous system is deeply implicated in nightmare suffering, and that using newer embodied trauma treatment methods that instill a sense of safety and connection are the starting points for treatment. I have incorporated what I learned in my doctoral research, and also what I have learned from existing evidence-based treatment to develop an individualized, embodied approach to treatment. This is described in my paper and upcoming workshop. I do hope you’ll join me.

 

Workshop: Nightmares and the Nervous System: How to treat disturbed dreaming
October 13, 9:30 to noon Pacific
LIVE online via Zoom, recording available to registrants
Cost: 140 (plus GST) = $147 USD

Addictions recovery chaplain says dreamwork practice is ‘transformative’

Dr. L.A. McRae offers impressions of their experience in the Embodied Experiential Dreamwork program

 

Sometimes a class can be truly transformative, and in this case Dr. L.A. McCrae, an addictions clinician and recovery chaplain feels this way after graduating from our year-long Embodied Experiential Dreamwork certification program. (A new cohort begins Sept. 21 and it’s not too late to join.)

L.A. noted that the dream program brought many helpful changes, both personally and professionally. “I am able to keep more of my dream content and really work through many underlying issues and concerns. Also, I have been able to integrate dreamwork with my individual clients and with my intensive outpatient groups. I now also keep a regular dream journal in my personal life. This has helped me to process trauma, grief, anxiety, and other uncertainties. I have found that I feel more alive in the non-waking life and am having meaningful connections and breakthroughs.”

I asked participants about the change in their comfort level in working with dreams. L.A. said, “At the beginning of the training, I felt that I was really in touch with my dreams. One of my spiritual gifts is dreaming and seeing beyond the veil. However, knowing what I now know, I would have put this competency at a 3. Since completing the program, I would say I am now an 8 and have a clear understanding of my growing edges.”

L.A. said their use of dreamwork in clinical practice has increased ten-fold and has shifted away from philosophical discussions to more experiential and focusing-oriented dreamwork. “With my individual clients, we always hold space for at least 15-minutes of dreamwork in every session. My clients really resonate with this practice and look forward to it. In my Anger Management outpatient group, we spend a significant amount of time with dreamwork and I have witnessed pretty amazing results. For instance, one participant was able to make the connections between the darkness he saw in his dream and the physical abuse from his father. This completely changed his demeanor and orientation towards healing. My Intensive Outpatient (IOP) group loves the opportunity to start the week with dream focusing in small groups. We went from no dreamwork to dreamwork almost every day.”

When asked what L.A. would say to those considering taking this program, they said, “DO IT! The experience in Dr. Ellis’ dreamwork course has changed both my personal and professional practice. The impact on/with my clients has been transformative. I have been able to access healing as an individual and hold space for healing with others. I am truly grateful for this experience and wish I could do it again! This dreamwork course was the best investment I made for professional development in the last decade.”

For more information about the program, visit https://drleslieellis.com/embodied-experiential-certification/.

Recurrent Dreams: What are they trying to tell us?

My main recurrent dream is of falling or diving from a precipitous height down a very steep cliff or slope. I wonder if it reflects all those years in university when I was competing for the diving team and spent hours each day falling fast and with a variable level of control. From a symbolic perspective, it could mean a fall from grace, and coming-down in some way, a loss of control. But these ideas are speculative. I prefer to spend time with the dreams themselves and their unique details – to open up to the dream so the felt sense it brings can unfold.

When someone brings me a recurring dream, I always ask not for general themes but the most recent or representative dream of its type. Recurrent dreams are important to pay attention to. They reflect more disturbed dreaming and I believe, represent themes or issues that are unresolved in some way. The classic version is the recurring nightmare after a trauma that has not been fully metabolized. There is a continuum of increasing severity and clinical concern that Domhoff (1993) identified as: repetition of dream elements, repetition of specific themes, exact repetition of dream content, repeated dream that resembles a trauma and repeated dream that replicates a trauma exactly. The research suggests that recurrent dreams coincide with decreased well-being, and that a positive shift often coincides with the cessation of such dreams.

Most adults have at least one recurring dream in their repertoire. I have been asked about these often lately (hence this blog post). A recent study by Schredl and colleagues (2022) reports that most recurrent dreams are negatively-toned, and the most common themes are ‘failure or helplessness’ and ‘being chased’. Interestingly, this supports my contention that dreams reflect the state of the nervous system – these themes could be seen as reflecting the classic immobility and the fight/flight responses to threat. Schredl wrote, “Overall, recurrent dreams seem to reflect waking life.”

However, for those who wake up many mornings feeling the aftermath of a dream depicting the same familiar challenge or fear, such generalizations are not helpful. In working with such dreams, I ask for details and particulars, and also how the dream situation feels to the dreamer. For example, Patty always had dreams of being trapped in a building, a kind of labyrinth, always being pursued and a sense she would be kidnapped. We entered this dream in her imagination, and she could see, to her surprise, that her pursuers were family members. She reflected that she was often the problem-solver and the emotional ballast for her family and this was a heavy burden. She spoke about setting better limits, making some changes, and as she did so, these dreams began to shift and fade.

Another dreamer I’ll call John always dreamt of being in a minefield, or a spy-like scenario where he had to go through all kinds of intricate traps and obstacles, and was always terrified of making a wrong move and detonating an explosion. These dream situations were like being Indiana Jones on a mission, but without the lightness. In feeling into a particular minefield dream, I asked John to notice the specific emotional flavour the dream brought, and wondered if it felt familiar. It quickly dawned on him that this was exactly what it felt like growing up with a narcissistic father prone to explosions of rage. Indeed, it felt like home was a minefield where it was easy to randomly put a foot wrong. He also reflected on his current relational patterns, and sensed into times with his partner that he felt he was walking on eggshells.

Understanding the possible source of such dreams brings some immediate relief, but insight doesn’t necessarily put an end to them. I have noticed that working through the challenging feelings they represent and then making life changes to address these dynamics is the most effective way to put recurrent dreams to rest – if that’s what’s desired. In my case, the falling dreams usually turn into something more fun than perilous: I am suddenly skiing with great skill, or can fly. Schredl noted that about 25% of recurrent dreams are positive: social, sexual, pleasant, interactive.

For those who have recurrent dreams of the unpleasant or downright terrifying variety, you might want to pause and consider what they could be about. I believe dreams reflect deep emotional processing, and if they repeat, there may be something that needs daytime attention. The further toward the severe end of Domhoff’s continuum (ie. replicative nightmares), the more the dreams are of clinical concern. The good news is that if the dreams and the life situations they reflect are worked with and metabolized, the more likely it is that the unwanted dreams will show up less often, and may even stop altogether.

 

References

Domhoff, G. W. (1993). The repetition of dreams and dream elements: a possible clue to the function of dreaming. In A. Moffitt, M. Kramer, & R. Hoffmann (Eds.), The functions of dreaming (pp. 293-320). SUNY Press.

Schredl, M., Germann, L., & Rauthmann, J. (2022). Recurrent Dream Themes: Frequency, Emotional Tone, and Associated Factors. Dreaming, OnlineFirst, 1